Each year for my birthday I’ve given myself a gift that is emotional, physical or spiritual. Its a habit I want to incorporate in my life, a mindset I would like to adopt. I spend weeks thinking about it; What should I give me? What does my 90 year old self want me to learn?
This year for my 49th birthday, my gift is a spiritual one. I want to be bolder. For those of you that know me you may say, “Leta, bolder? We don’t need that!”
It’s not like I hold back in being me. I preach kindness, love, and I am pretty open about my humanness, but I don’t think I’m as clear as I can be, as I should be, about what matters the very most to me. The only thing above my relationship with my LoverMan and my amazing kids is my relationship with God.
I know that each human soul is loved, divine and of indefinable, unimaginable worth to God. That heaven is real, not just because I’ve had moments of interaction with my daughter that has died, but also because of having a voice speak to me and arms hold me when Nathan briefly died in a heart attack. I have felt the arms of God not figuratively but literally.
I know heaven is real because of a hundred, thousand little moments of contact with what many call the divine; I call this God.
Without doubt, I know that Jesus Christ is the Savior of each of us, that each and every one of us will stand before God, the angels, and our advocate, Jesus Christ to account for this life.
This time, I want to give myself the gift that when I stand before that council, I can say I used my influence not only to reflect the love I’ve been given from God but also to testify and assure that I know.
I know it’s cool, trendy even to deny the existence of God, faith, and embrace whatever feels good. So even though I make my living off of the good impression I make on others, I put it all on the line. I would willingly, as it has often been said, die on this hill. This is not hyperbole, I am serious. I know God, I love my Heavenly Parents, and I love Jesus Christ. I hope my life shows that. And I hope every interaction I’ve had with you echoes this invitation, to connect with God.
You don’t have to believe like I do to have my friendship and respect, know that people of faith should have a voice too. We are being told we can’t speak. In an age with increased tolerance, myself, those I love, and many friends have experienced the opposite; No tolerance for our faith. Our expression of our love of God, we are told is hate of you. That is not what we feel and not what we believe. In sharing this, I am not telling you how you are to believe. Rather, I am telling you what I believe and inviting you to have the most sacred part of my soul.
Photo credit: Emily Pearl Photography #birthday #IBelieveGod #mydivinesparkofhotness
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