I have held off sharing this for sometime- it was that shocking to me.
A woman connected with me on LinkedIn, looking to be on my podcast. In her Bio, she had listed that she was a sexual abuse survivor and I love stories of resilience and overcoming.
As we hadn’t met yet, I set up a call with her before booking her on my podcast. She happily pitched herself, sharing who she is and what she does. She goes into schools and teaches children, starting in kindergarten all the way up to high school.
I admire it when people choose to teach kids. Thus, I am inclined to respect it. I’ve been doing maturation programs for 5th grade girls since 2014, and school assemblies since 2010. I understand that children are a rewarding yet a demanding group to present to. I realized that many do not have the ability to hold their attention.
While listening to her pitch, a couple of words popped out at me. I decided to ask some clarifying questions and asked, “When you say ‘pleasure’ are you talking about masturbation?”
“Yes!” Was her enthusiastic reply. She then continued to enthuse on the gravity of her work with children. Her teachings on sexual awareness and capacity…
I had to stop her. I had to make sure it wasn’t as horrible as I thought it was. I haltingly asked, “At what age are you advocating children to learn this skill by?”
“Oh at least by ten!”, she proudly responded.
I told her this was very problematic. Really, I find it repulsive. Yet, I held that part back, trying to be nice, and hoping to keep the conversation on the proverbial rails of civility.
She continued her declaration by backing it up with studies that “confirmed” her teachings.
Holding strong, I told her she would have to send them to me because I was pretty sure those studies were sponsored by pedophile advocacy groups. She then corrected me, affirming that the appropriate term was MAP, Minor-Attracted Persons. I stated to her that any softening of our society on the abhorrent nature of sex with children, would never receive any support from me. Sex with children SHOULD BE taboo. I would not give her any airtime on my platform.
I recognize that healthy debate is foundational in any great society. Nevertheless, it would make my audience uncomfortable to listen into our conversation. I am unwilling to put them into a situation like that.
She then proceeded to raise her voice at me- attempting to shame me into agreement. Instead of caving, I responded with a few facts. Like how early sexual exposure to children have not proven to lead them to fulfillment. This is especially damaging for young women.
Sexual experience of young girls lead them to seek out “capable” sexual partners, resulting in older men being their preference. Leaving girls with early trauma and power imbalances in their sexual activities. In fact, of all women who have reported to have the happiest sex lives are married women. Not single women in their 20’s.
Next, she progressed to mocking my marriage as outdated in an evolving society. I responded by saying I hoped that wasn’t the case. If her suggestions for societal progress were the best course, than we would be sacrificing our children on the altar of adults’ sexual interests. That isn’t evolution, that is evil.
To put it simply, she was not pleased with my assessment.
I thanked her for clarifications on her position and wished her the best. I lied.
I felt sick that she is going schools teaching this program. Having an older person guide a child through how to pleasure their body isn’t grooming. Even if the “teacher” doesn’t have such intentions, it is still opening the door to an abuser. I was first shown images and included in sexual conversations before he touched me sexually. First my mind was violated. Those images and conversations stalked me. They robbed me of my childhood innocence. Our children are being exposed to sexual content that is being packaged as progress. It is not progress.
The next week, a school I’ve done speeches for in the past called to book me for another maturation program. They asked if I had updated my content, or if they could expect the same presentation I had given in the past. At first, I pondered how there was nothing wrong with not changing my Powerpoint presentation from year to year. But then, I remembered the conversation I’ve just shared with you. I was able to answer with confidence. “No, I am not updating my content. Puberty hasn’t changed this last year. I will be presenting the same content as I have in the past.” I wasn’t sure if they’d like this answer, but the Principle sighed and said, “We are so glad”. We then proceeded to book the date I’d be coming to their school.
Check with your child’s school. See what they are teaching your children about their bodies. Research the presenters. The lady I talked with has a very similar bio to my own, yet we have very different positions on what childhood should be.
#maturation #children #awareness #caution #guidance #proper education