When You Shouldn’t Engage

I was reminded by a trusted friend, that though these other individuals have made me a target and are wrong to do so, they are feeding off of my hurt.

Actually, they’re feeding off my wounded PRIDE.

That’s the point, we could argue, but what does that get me, them, us? When has arguing ever produced understanding? Do they suddenly see the error?

Her advice is not to engage. Reminding me of the good advice I’ve received as I’ve desperately sought a solution. It’s all different words reminding me of my own pride, my own desire to be safe and understood.

All around us we can dig into different ideas. Who’s right? The answer is none of us are 100% right.

Be it in political ideology or interpersonal relationships… The answer lies in this, resolution won’t happen if both sides don’t want an end to the conflict. My pushing for a resolution is actually creating more conflict.

Someone has to swallow their pride and step out. The instinct between fight or flight, there is a third option to us the human-animal, who can rationalize and reason, step aside.

I want to keep growing and be better. Being understood is not a required element to being and becoming better version of ourselves.